I saved barely enough money to take 12 weeks of unpaid leave and today was my first day back. The day was fine, but I’m at work for 9 hours, then I factor in the commute which totals 2 hours a day, and that has me away from my baby for 11 hours Monday through Friday. I picked my baby up and got home at 6, she ate for 30 mins and then I washed bottles and Pump parts and bagged my extra milk - which took over an hour - and then I had to shower and eat and now I’m pumping and then going to bed because I have to be up at the ass crack of dawn. I’ve spent literally 30-40 mins with my baby today and it makes me so incredibly sad.
I don’t understand why the work day has to be the ENTIRE day ): or why the US hates mothers and infants.
I don’t know you but I am very proud of you!! Just the fact that you saved money to take unpaid leave says a lot about you. You’re a great mother and I know that even if it’s 30 minutes, your baby still feels your love for him/her!!
It’s so hard! I had to go back to work at 3 months, and now at 6 months I still wish more than anything that I could stay home. The work days are busy enough that I’m fine during the day, but I feel like I’m missing so much.
The one thing that makes me feel better, is that right now I’m still my baby’s favorite person. As soon as she sees me she wants me, and when she’s upset or not feeling well I’m the only person who can settle her. So even though I have to spend so much time away from her during the week she still knows I’m her person.
@Hadi
Definitely feel like the hardest part is going from seeing and being with my baby all day every day to now only getting less than an hour a day. Mamas are strong everywhere.
Jaime said: @Hadi
Definitely feel like the hardest part is going from seeing and being with my baby all day every day to now only getting less than an hour a day. Mamas are strong everywhere.
We are so strong! We gotta be for our babies, even though it’s hard.
Griffin said:
solidarity in the incomprehensible unfairness of being a mom in America.
I’m in Canada and we legally can take up to 18 months of maternity leave making 55% of your wage. It just cannot wrap my mind around posts like this. It breaks my dang heart.
@Oli
Some US states have the same pay rate but only for about 8 weeks or so. Still, absolutely awful and I don’t believe any conservative states have this at all.
Zeke said: @Oli
Some US states have the same pay rate but only for about 8 weeks or so. Still, absolutely awful and I don’t believe any conservative states have this at all.
Oh man, I just hate that so much! It is so unfair.
Zeke said: @Oli
Some US states have the same pay rate but only for about 8 weeks or so. Still, absolutely awful and I don’t believe any conservative states have this at all.
the irony is the states that have the stringent anti-women policy often have the worst maternity leave which just begs the question.
A young lady I worked with came back today after having her baby. She’s 3 weeks postpartum, my heart sank for her. I’m not too close to her to know the details as to why she came back so soon. I’m imagining my little girl when she was 3 weeks old, and I can’t imagine stepping away from her at that age.
@Skyler
I have a friend who went back after her c-section 4 weeks later because she needed the money and had no village aside from a few friends. She had to stop breastfeeding and is still so sad 3 years later about it.
I’m away from home for 11 hours too. It sucks, but it gets easier. The whole routine will get easier. It feels so unfair and I’ve thought about leaving my job but the benefits are just too good right now. My husband does all the daycare drop-offs and pickups and I feel like a crappy parent because I barely see his daycare providers.
We’re good parents though. We are doing this for them.
It was my first day back at work too. My baby was born prematurely so her daycare doesn’t start for another month. My mom was able to take care of my baby during the day for this bridge period but we have a bad relationship so it’s been extremely difficult to have her around and fighting with me while I’m trying to adjust back to work. We are strong and can do this I have such a newfound respect for working mothers.
I’m sure your commute home from work has never been this long. Unfortunately, this routine sucks for us. But I just wanted to say that you are a really great mom❤️
Commenting in solidarity bc yesterday was my first day back as well and spent around the same time with my LO and it’s absolutely crushed me. I left work thinking I can’t believe I have to do this again tomorrow
I don’t live in the US and reading these posts crushes my heart. It shouldn’t be like this and I hope mothers’ voices will be heard and something will change. I imagine future generations will be shaking their heads in dismay at how it is. I personally think having time with BOTH mama and papa should be a birthright to every human being. I also think working for 9h+2h commute is too much, even without a baby. Your whole life goes there! I really hope things change soon.
I have such a newfound respect for working mothers.