Daycare gave formula and says baby wants it more than breastmilk

Childcare Forum
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My 6mo baby has been sleeping so-so (night wakes every hour and short 30-40 min daytime naps). He is EBF.
Yesterday his daycare, without consulting with me, gave him formula and are now saying that he was very eager to eat it all up, immediately fell asleep afterwards and had a great nap, and was not so keen on drinking my pumped breastmilk afterwards. They are kind of hinting on the fact that there might be something wrong with my breastmilk (not fatty enough?) and that it would be better to give the baby a mix of milk and formula.
First of all, I’m upset. Upset that my milk which I have enough of, which my baby has always enjoyed and asked for, now seems to not be enough and I don’t know how to make it better for him.
Also, everything I’ve read said that breastmilk is the best for a baby and I’ve been determined to breastfeed until he is 1 yr old at least.
I will test it out today myself to see if he really does want formula more than breastmilk, but has anyone had this issue that the baby started to prefer formula? What should I do?

Edit: We discussed previously with the daycare that they would feed him formula only and only if they run out of my breastmilk for the day (I bring it every day after pumping). What they did was start off the day with it instead when he had enough milk to drink for the day ahead

Edit 2: my question is not about the daycare (someone changed my flair) but about the formula - could it be that my milk is lacking something and that formula could be more preferable? Could it be that it helps him sleep better? Should I switch to mixed feeds?

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I would be wildly livid. What a massive violation of your right as a parent to determine what is in your child’s best interest. I would honestly be pulling my child and calling the state licensing board over that kind of non-emergency unilateral decision making on something so personal.

As far as the practicality of supplementing formula: Is your pediatrician worried about weight gain? Or the sleeping? Is the overnight and nap schedule working for you (and the baby’s other parent, if applicable)? The good news is that at 6 months, your child is starting to supplement solids anyway, so that should help provide a longer-to-digest layer to the situation regardless, and is probably where I would put my focus.

3

@Quill
I edited the post above with some details on the formula situation, although I also think they overstepped, but maybe not as severely: We discussed previously with the daycare that they would feed him formula only and only if they run out of my breastmilk for the day (I bring it every day after pumping). What they did was start off the day with it instead

In terms of weight, our LO has always been on the larger side and over the 90th percentile. He has slowed weight gain the past month, but the ped said it is totally normal for EBF babies. He did however advise to increase amount of solids, so we will be starting that.

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@Zeke
Regarding your second edit: there’s almost certainly nothing wrong with your breast milk. It takes longer for babies to digest formula than breast milk, so that could be why he napped longer. But also in baby time, a one-day change doesn’t really mean anything…so he could also have just been more tired, he could have suddenly decided he likes longer naps, the sun could have been hitting just right, or he might have felt particularly full from the formula. He also might have “preferred” it because it was novel and he’s in a quickly-expanding curious stage, but it definitely doesn’t mean the preference would be sustained or that it’s a better choice. Honestly, I wouldn’t even bother with “testing” at home if he’s thriving and your preference is to continue breastfeeding. Just focus on solids as per your pediatrician—he sounds like he’s a good eater and so will probably really have fun with them!

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@Quill
My EBF baby usually naps 32 minutes. Except when he naps 1.5 hours. :woman_shrugging: no formula involved just baby randomness.

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Hale said:
@Quill
My EBF baby usually naps 32 minutes. Except when he naps 1.5 hours. :woman_shrugging: no formula involved just baby randomness.

My EBF baby naps exactly 32 minutes too. :sob:

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Morgan said:

Hale said:
@Quill
My EBF baby usually naps 32 minutes. Except when he naps 1.5 hours. :woman_shrugging: no formula involved just baby randomness.

My EBF baby naps exactly 32 minutes too. :sob:

Both of mine have! It’s so weird. Thankfully they have decent night sleep, but whew!

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@Quill
Thank you, will do!

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@Zeke
Definitely take the formula home. There’s no reason for them to have it, and they have abused the privilege. It’s also a fairly common observation on r/breastfeedingsupport that daycares are somewhat notorious for not understanding how breastfeeding works and are more familiar with formula feeding [edited].

Solids will help, and it will give you an option of something to send extra of as a security measure if you’re worried about baby being hungry.

I still hold that the daycare was completely overstepping in giving the formula and would feel it as a betrayal of trust, but I am relieved to hear it was at least a product you had picked out and provided for your baby. Still—breastfeeding is incredibly hard work, and if you want to continue to do it, in no world should a non-medical-professional be making you insecure in that, much less trying to take that away from you or be usurping your efforts. You and your milk have grown your baby into a thriving little 90th percentiler! You should be nothing but proud of yourself.

Edited: removed incorrect information (thank you u/whyisthefloor)

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@Quill
Thank you so much for the kind words and the encouragement!
I’m from Europe, here in the Netherlands the daycare have their own formula (same as we have at home just in case), so I guess it boils down to me having a talk with them about their overstepping. Hate these situations but what to do, need to advocate for my little guy and myself for that matter.
Thank you again!

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@Zeke
I’m in the Netherlands too and our daycare tried to do the same thing. I cried and my husband went on the warpath, and they respected our wishes about pumped milk after that. Your child, your decisions - make sure they understand that.

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@Cedar
Oh my, so it’s common practice?! And now the trust is broken, I’m going to be thinking all the time if they are giving him formula just not telling me… what daycare do you go to btw, is a chain?

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@Zeke
I’m living in the NL as well and we go to Kanteel. So far it’s only the beginning and now I’m really hoping they stick to our plan!!!

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Cameron said:
@Zeke
I’m living in the NL as well and we go to Kanteel. So far it’s only the beginning and now I’m really hoping they stick to our plan!!!

We go to Compananny, they had really good reviews so I’m surprised I’m encountering this now.

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@Quill
Daycare totally overstepped but the statement about breastmilk composition changing as baby grows isn’t true—it does change in terms of antibodies but it doesn’t change in terms of caloric or other nutrient composition. And formula fed and breastmilk fed babies eat about the same quantity.

Some science:

The volume babies consume will stay pretty stable, barring growth spurts and is not dependent on breastfeeding v pumping v formula. Generally around 26-32 ounces once out of the newborn stage.

FWIW it is NOT true that milk becomes more calorie dense as they get older, or at least not for the first 12-18 months of life. Mature milk is incredibly stable during the first 12-18 months of life in terms of calorie, fats, protein, ect.

Human Milk Composition: Nutrients and Bioactive Factors - PMC.

By four to six weeks postpartum, human milk is considered fully mature. In contrast to the dramatic shift in composition observed in the first month of life, human milk remains relatively similar in composition, although subtle changes in milk composition do occur over the course of lactation.

See also: Breast Milk Composition: Key Nutrients & Changes | Medela

By the time your baby is four weeks old, your breast milk will be fully mature. It’s rich in protein, sugar, vitamins and minerals, plus numerous bioactive components – such as hormones, growth factors, enzymes and live cells – to support your baby’s healthy growth and development.

From four weeks, the nutritional content and levels of ingredients in mature milk generally remain fairly consistent. But the composition of your breast milk can still change from day to day and feed to feed.

For an extended discussion of when actual nutritional/caloric/compositional changes in breastmilk do take place (generally in prolonged feeding of 18 months plus) see Breast Milk Macronutrient Components in Prolonged Lactation - PMC

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@Micah
Thanks for the correction, that myth drives me nuts

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@Micah
Thank you for posting this! I get so frustrated when I see this myth perpetuated!

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@Zeke
They didn’t follow your instructions. I would be upset. Is it easier for them to give formula? Our daycare warms breastmilk but makes formula as needed at the temp needed also it’s quicker for them to do formula. I’ve definitely felt them pressuring us to switch to formula. Maybe I’m just cynical because we’ve had not-so-great experiences with them but I could see some teachers fibbing a bit to get you to switch to formula for their own ease.

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@Chen
Yeah I also had the thought that it’s just easier for them - but I’m standing my ground, it’s their job to feed my baby what I choose.

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Zeke said:
@Chen
Yeah I also had the thought that it’s just easier for them - but I’m standing my ground, it’s their job to feed my baby what I choose.

As you should! I think I ended up breastfeeding a bit longer than I actually wanted because I’m stubborn and didn’t want to cave to their pressure haha.