So I see other people posting about reading books, bedtime routines, and floor tummy time with their brand new newborns, and I’m worried if I’m doing something wrong.
Our son sleeps, eats, and cries, and there isn’t much awake time when he isn’t screaming or eating.
While breastfeeding, I spend a lot of time (which I find awkward) reading or watching Netflix.
Tummy time is on my chest.
We only go on one walk or run one errand per day, and we frequently have to stop to feed him or he sleeps through them.
We do not have a nighttime routine or specific time. He falls asleep. We cosleep and dream feed in the cuddle curl position all night.
My LO is four months old, and after approximately a month, I decided to stop worrying about a regular plan and simply go with the flow. That made my life so much easier. Every baby is unique, and focusing on what others are doing will only cause you to become upset, and a stressful you equals a stressed baby. Around 5-8 weeks is also peak fussy time for a newborn because they are beginning to understand that the world around them exists. You’ve got this!
The first 12 weeks are chaotic. There is no rhyme or rhythm. My little one is four months old, and we have a nighttime routine that I try to stick to every day. However, nothing else follows a set pattern. I just go with the flow, from naps to play, tummy time, etc.
This is completely normal. I felt the same pressure during the newborn stage. Looking back, I feel sad that I couldn’t relax more and enjoy the newborn bubble for what it was, instead of feeling pressured to stick to a schedule. There were lots of Netflix, snuggles, and contact naps. Daily long walks. Feeding and sleeping around the clock. I was always confused when people talked about “bedtime.” What is bedtime for a newborn who is awake and eating every 2-3 hours?
All this to say, I hope you can relax, find your flow, worry less about a schedule, and soak up all the snuggles. Now, my 8-month-old wants to rip my lips off my face or pull my hair when I try to snuggle her .
I agree with all of this! I felt the same way you did, OP. Now that my son is 4 months old, I’d suggest don’t stress about a pattern until 3 months; instead, do what works best for you and your kid. Enjoy your Netflix time while breastfeeding. I miss it. I intend to focus more on establishing a sleep habit around 5 months, and his wake windows will begin to expand after 3 months, allowing for more “playing” time. I still seldom do tummy time, and he has excellent head control.
Our “bedtime routine” consists of Miss 6wks screaming her head off while I pace, pat, and sing lullabies with increasingly snarky lyrics. Eventually she passes out and then I pump again.
She’s had less than a month of practice with having a digestive system, and we’re both learning a lot of new things. We’ll figure out a routine eventually.
Thank you for asking this! My girl is 4 weeks tomorrow and I feel the same.
I don’t have energy to read to her before bed. At all. I’ve always looked forward to reading to my kids but with no energy left at night plus her not even giving a single shit about looking at the book or listening to me, I don’t see the point.
I’ve always been very bad with tummy time and I feel guilty about it. Either it’s too close to when I last fed her and she’ll spit up, or shes sleeping.
I think it’s hard to have a routine when they’re changing so much. My LO had 4 or 5 days of going to bed around the same time but then 3 week cluster feeding maddens happened and she was up from 7-12 eating constantly for a several days.
I’m just going with the flow. I don’t know if that’s right, but it’s all I can manage right now.
This! Babies change so quickly that even if I had a schedule at this point, the following week would most likely look completely different.
I also discovered that bedtime reading was not working for us, so now we read in the morning (or the afternoon if I didn’t get to it sooner). The key thing is that we got to read together.
I totally get it. My baby is 4 weeks old, and we have no routine either. We just go with the flow, and nothing happens at the same time each day. I see people talking about bedtime rituals, and I’m like, “Why bother?” My baby never sleeps for the same amount of time, eats the same amount, or even goes to the bathroom at the same times. Why would I stress myself out trying to stick to a schedule? Maybe those lucky parents with miracle babies who sleep 7-8 hours from week 2 can manage a schedule. But for people like me, who haven’t slept more than 2.5 hours straight in the past month, why would I even try to make a schedule? Yes, I’m frustrated and exhausted!
You’re doing exactly the same as me; I’m 8 weeks in, the baby is happy and healthy, and I still feel like myself! I’m actually enjoying Netflix days because the older he gets, the more demanding he’ll be. The only regimen you need to follow is the one set by your baby, which will change every hour.
Your baby is still so young, and it’s completely normal not to have a set routine yet. A lot of the “bedtime” routines and story times we tried were more for me to get used to the timing of things rather than for my baby, who didn’t really care. I would read to her while nursing because she often fell asleep after feeds, leaving little time for tummy time. We skipped baths most of the time before she was 2 months old because her sleep was more important, even though we planned to do them. Now that she’s over 4 months, we’re still pretty flexible with our routine because life happens.
Enjoy your Netflix while you can! Once my little one started becoming more aware, I couldn’t even watch anything with headphones on without her getting distracted. Now, I just get to stare at her during nursing sessions.
Completely normal. Don’t stress about establishing routines. You’re simply trying to survive and become accustomed to keeping a tiny human alive. Do whatever you need to get through the day. Any more tummy time is a benefit.
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