@GraceWenger
I appreciate your honesty. It’s only fair that you feel that way. I just want it to be clear that I’m not manipulative.
@GraceWenger
He’s not being forced. He has said yes, though uncertain about timing. But he’s on board now.
If they have a child and it doesn’t work out, they can always separate later. OP is aware she doesn’t have a lot of time left. There’s a chance they won’t conceive at all.
@Marlowe
It sounds like he agreed simply to avoid a breakup, not because he genuinely wants to raise a child. That’s essentially forcing him.
We shared similar feelings. The first 18 months were tough because I felt it was my choice, and I had to protect him from the child I chose to bring into the world. He was physically present but really struggled. However, once we hit the 18-month mark, he came around completely. Just last night, our little one ran to him as he got home from work and it was heartwarming to see.
My husband experienced similar feelings. He had never even held a baby before our son. Despite his hesitance, we had been together for 11 years and were in a stable place. I suggested coming off birth control and seeing how we felt about trying, which was such an adjustment after years of contraceptives.
In the end, I got pregnant faster than expected, and he was initially worried. Unfortunately, that pregnancy didn’t last, and I was concerned he would check out. Rather, he was ready to try once more more quickly than I was. That experience made him realize how badly he wanted a child.
After some challenges, we finally welcomed our son, and he has become the amazing father I always believed he would be!
Initially, my boyfriend insisted he didn’t want children. But when I got pregnant a few years back, I had to tell him that it was an ectopic pregnancy. In that brief moment of uncertainty, before I told him, he came around to the idea very quickly. Now we have a daughter, and he enjoys playing with her and watching her grow.
At first, my fiancé said he wanted to wait until he was ready. I took multiple tests before revealing the news. I told him on Valentine’s Day without realizing it was actually a sweet moment.
He ended up wanting the baby, but his timing was not ideal since he had just quit his job. During my pregnancy, he wasn’t very nice, and we fought a lot, mostly due to my hormones. But things improved after the baby arrived.
When I realized having kids was a must for me, my partner took a few weeks to decide what he wanted. Eventually, he opened up to the idea of kids. I’d be lying if I said wanting to preserve our relationship didn’t factor into his decision, but it wasn’t the main reason. Unfortunately, we went through a complicated process of IVF and multiple losses, which left him feeling isolated. Our daughter is now five weeks old, and he’s becoming an active, caring dad. I see his bond with her developing and know he’s excited about when she is more interactive.
Neither of us wanted kids initially, but as we moved through our 30s, we realized we did want a family. After trying for 2 months, we unexpectedly got pregnant. My husband didn’t really grasp it as a reality until the 12-week scan, and he did panic a bit afterward.
Now our baby is 12 weeks old and brings us so much joy. My husband is a very present and loving dad.
Maybe you should check out r/regretfulparents to see if that’s a path you want for any potential kids
My husband was hesitant about kids due to his upbringing but agreed to try for a baby because he knew I wanted one so badly.
Once our daughter was born, he told me if he had known how much he would love being a dad, he would have done it sooner. She continues to be the light of his life, even 14 months later.
When I found out I was pregnant, my partner was against it and not very nice about it. I fought for our baby, and once I reached a point of acceptance, I scheduled an appointment with planned parenthood and decided to end the relationship. We were in bed when he answered a call from his mom, telling her he’s going to be a dad. I couldn’t understand their conversation since they were speaking a different language, but it was indeed wonderful. Following that, he really stepped up, despite having many doubts along the way.
Almost 7 months after giving birth, he is now an amazing dad. He’s still learning but puts in significant effort, and I rely on him a lot. It’s a rollercoaster, but I’m overall very pleased.