Tonight was rough. We typically don’t cosleep with our babies due to the risks and my husband being a very heavy sleeper. But tonight was different. Our 2-month-old wouldn’t sleep without being held. Exhausted, I lay in bed with her and accidentally fell asleep with her on my chest. In my sleep, I must have rolled to my side, and she ended up in the middle of the bed.
I woke up 30 minutes to an hour later because she was squirming under the blanket, with my husband’s leg over her legs and my arm over her head. She couldn’t breathe. When I pulled her out, she gasped for air. Thank God I woke up, or it could have been bad. I told my husband I wasn’t going to put her in the middle because I didn’t think she was safe there, but that’s where she ended up.
Needless to say, I won’t be cosleeping again until she and her brother are much older.
I know the rules of safe sleeping. I accidentally fell asleep. I planned to stay awake and put her back in her bed when she fell asleep, but that’s not what happened.
Scary. I’m glad everything is okay. But you have more safer options.
No father in bed. Just you and the baby. Put the bed on the floor. Ideally, no blanket or pillow, so dress warmly for bed. You need to stay on your side in that curl position to avoid rolling. Try to avoid cosleeping for at least four months.
You live and learn. My 14-month-old just slipped off the bed while sleeping with me for the first time tonight, around two hours ago. I am sad. Bed will eventually move on the floor tomorrow.
Exactly. I don’t cosleep as a rule, but if our 5-month-old wakes up and we’re both too tired to be trusted, baby goes in the middle of the bed, I put on my robe so I don’t need blankets, and my husband gets kicked to the couch while I nurse her to sleep. Once she can roll, I might look into mesh bed rails or just put the bed on the floor. If I feel uneasy about it, I set a timer on my phone to vibrate every 10-20 minutes to keep me from falling too deeply asleep. That might be overkill, but my baby was born early, so we don’t have the “full-term baby” component of safe cosleeping. I really try to avoid intentional cosleeping, at least until she’s a bit older.
I know you feel terrible, and I’m not here to shame you. If you haven’t already, please look into safe co-sleeping options as soon as possible.
It’s entirely possible that you’ll have another night like this, and that’s the only way she’ll go down. Also, times like tonight are when you share the duty of getting her to sleep if you are not going to co-sleep.
I’m pleased she’s okay. None of us intended to fall asleep, but fatigue is real. Sleep deprivation would impress the CIA. Even if you don’t want to cosleep, follow safe sleep recommendations nevertheless; this way, if you fall asleep, everything will be much safer.
That seems really terrifying. I’m so sad that occurred to you and your kid, but I’m so glad to hear she was strong enough to move around and wake you up. I can’t fathom hearing that gulp. Consider getting a chair to sit in instead of lying comfortably in your bed. Perhaps this can help you stay awake. Also, I know it’s bad, but I go through my phone in the middle of the night during night feeds to keep myself awake. Best wishes, from one sleep-deprived mom to another .
I’ve accidently fallen asleep before, and it’s terrifying. I was feeding them upright and holding them for a few hours while I slept. I still can’t believe it occurred, and that I was holding her the entire time. I awoke with a strong fear that something had gone wrong. I am sorry you had to go through this.
This is the whole point, though; simply follow them whenever the baby is in bed, in case you fall asleep. (Unless you’re wide awake in the middle of the day and playing with them in bed for some reason).
If you are concerned about your husband’s deep sleep, I recommend buying a well-fitting bedrail as soon as possible so you may feel confident putting the baby on the outside.
Sounds like a parent made a mistake that they will not repeat. Those first few months are so difficult. You cannot let this one error ruin your life, but you must remember it for as long as you have children. We all have a general sense of what we’re doing, but we don’t know.
I know it’s hard, but try not to let it consume you. In the end, nothing horrible happened; you woke up and realized what was going on. What ifs are only useful in preventing future events. You know what you would do differently next time, and that is sufficient. There will be no parent who has not had a near-miss while weary. These difficulties often seem insurmountable when we’re fatigued. The account co-sleeping has just released their bed-sharing handbook for free, if you need some confidence with bed-sharing. It’s one thing to know how to do it, but it’s another to feel confident in it. Remember that you are not alone in your experiences or emotions.
I’m so sorry this happened. If you reside in a chilly climate, she may have only been able to fall asleep in your arms. Try wrapping her up further or turning on the heat.
Get a side crib for your bed! When she is too weary or side-lying while nursing, lay her down on the opposite side of the bed. If you do fall asleep, it will be safer.
There is also a method for safe chest sleep. Check out Cosleepy on Instagram. Babies really enjoy it. I agree with the preceding person that you should always keep your bed prepared for safe co-sleeping to avoid this happening.
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