I am curious how much active playtime other parents have with their babies. My baby is 7.5 months old. Both myself and my husband work full time, so she is in daycare on weekdays. When she is home in the evenings and on weekends, we are very hands-on with her. We do let her play alone if we are preparing meals or doing other chores, but if we have “free time”, we are spending it with her - ie: one of us is usually sitting on the floor with her while she plays, singing songs, reading, helping with skills, taking her for a walk, etc.
I think both of us miss having actual free time where we are doing things for ourselves, but it feels weird to set the baby down to play while I read a book or crochet or whatever else. Especially on weekdays where we only see her before and after work. I’m curious how other families navigate this - do you spend most of your baby’s awake/at home time playing with them too? Do you feel weird about doing your own hobbies alongside the baby?
Abi said:
If you sit on the floor and crochet, give the baby a ball of decoy yarn and now the two of you are parallel playing!
I’ve thought about doing this! It might be nice to “play together” - especially if I can still be right next to her doing my thing while she does hers.
@Hollis
I always brought my knitting when I worked as a nanny. It’s nice to both have a “project” to work on, and feels more natural than just staring at Baby while she plays with toys.
Just tie the ball of decoy yarn so she can’t unwind it!
I have a 6.5 month old and take the same approach as you. I really only truly see him a few hours a day now and want to enjoy it.
I look at it like a season of life. He’ll have friends, playdates, sports, play more independently, and even watch shows and movies where I’ll get to do other things. My husband and I do switch off for a few hours on the weekends so we get time to do our own thing. He gets Saturday mornings until around 11 or so; I get the same Sunday and I go to a fitness class and bop around town.
@Noor
It definitely is a season! I like the idea of switching off for a longer stretch on weekends, though. It would be really refreshing to have a block of time to do our own things.
Hollis said: @Noor
It definitely is a season! I like the idea of switching off for a longer stretch on weekends, though. It would be really refreshing to have a block of time to do our own things.
it makes a huge difference and I come back totally refreshed. And it’s nice he gets dedicated solo time with both of us.
@Noor
I like how you said this. My baby girl (11 mos) is a MOVER! she doesn’t stop. My husband and I are both teachers, so we are exhausted when we get home! Then we’re running around with her playing all evening. By her bedtime, we are tired. lol. I keep reminding myself that this too shall pass, and so she’ll be wanting to play with friends/play sports/activities instead of us! So we’re soaking it all in now while we can!! Honestly makes me emotional when I think of it that way! Going so fast!!
@Jori
Oh, I bet you’re tired as a teacher. That’s a lot of young personalities to handle all day! I think I have the advantage of having a 10-year-old stepson and I see now vs. when I met him when he was 2. We have to work to get him out of his room to come engage with us compared to even a few years ago where he’d come find us if we were in another room for longer than a few minutes. We’re their whole world right now! It’ll get bigger so fast and no longer revolve around their home life with mom and dad.
My 9 month old actually prefers independent play. I’m always in the same room as him and I verbally interact with him as he plays, but I kind of just let him do his own thing. I do like to read books with him and we go on walks together. I also get on the floor with him to be close to him, but in general, most of his playtime he’s on his own.
@Drew
That’s cool! I might try crocheting on the floor with my baby. She does pretty well playing on her own as long as we’re nearby, so maybe this will go well!
Hollis said: @Drew
That’s cool! I might try crocheting on the floor with my baby. She does pretty well playing on her own as long as we’re nearby, so maybe this will go well!
I love that you crochet. My mom has crocheted my whole life, and I asked her to crochet our baby’s Christmas stocking! He’ll have it forever, and that makes me really happy. Have you made many things for your baby yet?
@Drew
Aw that’s awesome! I pretty much only make things for my baby now haha. I recently made her a sweater that I hope will fit her next fall. Crocheting tiny baby things is so much faster than making things for my adult-sized body haha.
My 8 month old is very independent - I let him free play or look out the window and pick him up for some snuggles and get on the floor when he seems to be looking for me. I’d say we get about 2-3 hours of focused play together; otherwise I let him play by himself while I read or work next to him. I WFH part-time.
@Kirby
That sounds like a pretty nice balance. I’m curious, do you have a low window or do you sit your baby in a chair to look out? My baby loooooves the outdoors, but all of our windows are high up. I bet she would love to be able to look outside though!
We are the same with our 7 month old! I think the biggest thing is just trying to take advantage of the evenings after he goes to sleep and not feeling guilty switching off a bit to go and do things like work out. I’m really only leaving him to play for 5-10 minutes here or there to get something cleaned or cooked (but for cooking he really wants to be included haha).