I’m not convinced that putting them down drowsy but awake actually works, lol.
As a first-time mom with a 2.5-month-old who stopped napping independently at 6 weeks, I can say she sleeps well at night in her bassinet. Bedtime is around 7:30 PM, we wake her up for a bottle around 10 PM, and then she goes back down until about 4 AM. After that, she sleeps again until 7 or 8 AM, but it’s contact naps only during the day.
When I try to put her down drowsy but awake, she fully wakes up and gives me a look like, “How dare you?” I’ll pat and shush her in the bassinet for a few minutes, but she’s unimpressed and not drowsy at all. I’ve also tried leaving her for 5-10 minutes, but she just lays there cooing, eventually fussing and crying. When I pick her up and rock her, she’s out like a light in minutes.
Once she’s asleep, I rush to eat, pee, drink some water, and maybe start a house chore before she wakes up at the 35/45 minute mark. I know that’s the end of her sleep cycle, so I try all the strategies mentioned above with zero effectiveness, so I end up picking her up for a contact nap to ensure she gets better sleep.
I know this isn’t a unique situation, so any tips, advice, or other strategies to try are welcome!
“Drowsy but awake” never worked for us and just led to frustration for both baby and mom.
Until she was about 4 months old, I’d let her fall asleep on me and then transfer her to the crib. This helped her learn to connect sleep cycles in the crib.
When she started not wanting to fall asleep on me, we began rocking her to sleep in her room with the sound machine on and night light. Once she was asleep, we’d transfer her to the crib. We repeated this process and gradually reduced the amount of time spent rocking her.
Now, at 10.5 months, she gets rocked for a few minutes and then put into her crib awake. She puts herself to sleep after a few minutes.
This sounds just like my 5.5-month-old! She only contacts naps and can’t connect her nap sleep cycles. However, she sleeps through the night almost every night from 8:30 PM to 7:30 AM. At night, she can settle herself if she wakes up or just needs a quick pacifier replacement to fall back asleep.
What did you do to help your baby connect nap-sleep cycles?
I was scared about the same thing, but she sleeps so well! I believe that allowing her to fall asleep on us while remaining in the crib for the majority of the nap helped her. Of course, it was difficult for her to connect sleep cycles on her own for the first week or so, and I’d help and restart the process, but we basically discovered this by accident. Plus, we never had to perform any formal sleep training or anything.
Initially, it was pacis during nap. She wouldn’t fall asleep on me without one, so I’d put one in and she’d be out. If it slipped out during her nap, I’d check if she fell back asleep, and if she kept waking up, I’d go in and just pop it in and leave. After we entirely unswaddled her, she discovered her thumb and now sleeps with it rather than a pacifier. It wasn’t always great and at first felt like I was simply dashing in and out, but consistency helped when she learned she wasn’t getting out of the crib.
The same technique applies here! At 6 months, we’re just starting to get him to go DBA into the crib. My doctor mentioned it at 2 months, and it was definitely not going to happen until he was ready; I tried every now and then just to see, and he wasn’t having it till the week. I believe it’s just on their own timeframe.
I still hold my 13-month-old daughter until she is entirely asleep before putting her down.
She still almost entirely takes contact naps.
Also, around 2.5 months, it is primarily due to age. They aren’t even capable of synchronizing their sleep cycles, which is why she wakes up after 30 or 45 minutes.
Mine is over 22 months old and still gets rocked to sleep.
Which is starting to irritate me, but we’re probably done, so I’m trying to take it all in. But he also refuses to go asleep on his own. We tried crying it out (with time constraints). He does not fall asleep on his own. But at least I get some decent cuddles out of the bargain.
Our 3-year-old never went down drowsy but awake. We held her till she fell asleep at 11 months old, and then it was a cautious transition to her crib. It was quite hard. I’m 16 days pregnant with my second child, and she falls asleep weary yet awake, which is the strangest experience I’ve ever had. I am confident that temperament is the sole factor that determines whose children will perform DBA!!
Drowsy but awake works for me, but I doubt I had to do anything unusual to get him there; he just falls asleep on his own. I follow a nighttime ritual (bath, massage, bottle, and/or nursing) and then place him in his cot with a nightlight, pacifier, and sound machine. He’ll play about for about 5 minutes and then fall asleep.
I could have written this. In fact, I wrote a very similar piece lately, and there wasn’t much else done differently. Following to see if there are any more suggestions! My five-month-old only sleeps well while contact napping. Co-sleeping or laying next to me in bed is also out because the position is basically the same as laying flat in her bassinet, and she wakes up right away and wants to play.
I am confident that temperament is the sole factor that determines whose children will perform DBA!!
Following to see if there are any more suggestions! My five-month-old only sleeps well while contact napping. Co-sleeping or laying next to me in bed is also out because the position is basically the same as laying flat in her bassinet, and she wakes up right away and wants to play.