Disappointed by a fellow mom

Travel
1

We were flying back home after our first trip with our infant. We had bought a seat on the plane to ensure our daughter would be safe and comfortable in her car seat. The gate agent kindly let us board early so we could set up her car seat.

About 20 minutes later, a mom with two small kids, one under 2, boarded last and in a frazzled state. Her husband was denied boarding because the airline had oversold seats. She sat in the row behind us, clearly distraught, with her toddler asking for his dad. She made it very clear to the plane by telling her son, “Daddy will meet us later, he’ll be on another flight because everyone was selfish and now there aren’t any seats left,” while glaring at me and my daughter. She then announced, “I hope he (her son) screams for the entire flight.” This wasn’t okay, but I understood her panic and let it go, focusing on my baby instead.

After the gate closed and she settled in with her children, she made another snarky comment towards my daughter, saying, “It is so selfish for the baby to have daddy’s seat.” My blood was boiling. My husband asked her to stop making snide comments, but she didn’t take it well and started raising her voice. Fortunately, the flight attendant intervened, threatening to remove her and her children if she continued. She remained somewhat silent for the rest of the flight, though she still made a few snarky remarks.

This was not okay. I understand it was a stressful moment for her family, and my husband and I were sympathetic. But lashing out at our daughter was unwarranted. We bought her a seat so she could travel safely and comfortably, just like everyone else. Her anger should have been directed at the airline, not us.

If the mom had been kind, I might have considered offering my daughter’s seat. As a fellow mom, I wanted to show kindness, but her animosity made that impossible. I was so stressed knowing she harbored so much anger towards us for the entire flight. I feel like I should shrug this off, but I can’t help feeling disappointed by the situation. Parenting is hard enough—we should support each other instead of attacking others when things get tough. Is that too much to ask?

2

Interesting. Airlines are supposed to bump people first and then separate groups if absolutely required.

3

Yeah, that sounds weird. Perhaps the lady has her facts wrong. But she should not take it out on the OP. If OP purchased a seat for her infant, she did so because she wanted to! Nobody should say anything about it or blame her for daddy not making the flight.

4

I bet there’s more to this tale, like they arrived really late or were flying standby from the start - because, in addition to bumping people first and all that, the OP claims they boarded last.

Every airline I’ve ever flown with prioritizes the elderly, babies, and people in need of additional assistance.

5

Yes! There is definitely something else going on, and I believe that is why she was so agitated and made those nasty statements. Not saying what she said was okay in any way.

6

This is why, whenever possible, I arrive at least three and a half hours before international flights and two and a third hours before domestic flights. They frequently bump the final people to check in into the same price bracket. And if I may check in online the day before I arrive.

7

If you have a lap infant, many airlines will not allow you to check in until you are at the airport, and sitting in an airport for hours with a child under two is not ideal, so I usually arrive later for my flights than I used to.

8

I’m curious, which airlines don’t allow this? I’ve flown frequently with my toddler and have never been unable to check in with a lap infant.

9

I flew with American Airlines yesterday with a lap infant and couldn’t get my boarding pass until I arrived at the airport. I didn’t receive my seat assignment until I got to the gate, where I was told my seat had been oversold and I didn’t have an actual seat on the plane (though my husband and 3-year-old did). We already had our bags and car seats on the plane and were informed that the only other American flight from SFO to Chicago that day was also fully booked. At the very last minute, after everyone had boarded, they rushed us onto the plane, claiming there was an open seat. But there wasn’t. They had issued me a ticket for a seat that was already occupied and then kicked the other passenger off the plane, leaving both of us baffled. So, I made it on the flight with my family, but it was not a great experience, and I felt terrible for the guy who got kicked off (he showed the flight attendant his ticket with his seat assignment). I’ve traveled quite a bit and never experienced anything like this. I’m definitely going to avoid flying American in the future. They also gave us a hard time about our stroller wagon (Veer), which we’ve flown with many times without issues—even Spirit didn’t hassle us last month.

10

International flights make you check in in person with a lap infant. Domestic flights do not.

11

Eh, I already answered to the comment above. You can still check in; they simply validated the passport at the airport while checking the bags. Ultimately, I check in/verify to ensure that the seat is not given away.

12

This summer, I flew internationally with my 7/8 month child in a car seat and checked in without issue. They checked the passport at the airport. I overprepared with items in the suitcases, and thank God everything went as easily as possible lol. There’s not much difference between sitting on the floor at home with toys and sitting on a blanket at the airport with toys.

13

Airline: Your husband can’t have the seat he paid for because we’re selfish bastards that don’t care about our customers.

This lady: This is quite inconvenient. I believe I’ll blame a random infant and make it their problem.

14

I would have been furious if I had been that parent, and I would have yelled at someone from the airline, not an innocent mother with a baby. Overselling flights on a regular basis is a crime that is entirely beyond the OP’s control.

15

Wow! That mother is demented and teaches her children all the wrong lessons in life. You did nothing wrong, and good on you for being calm! Just reading this made my blood boil!!